Yesterday, I had a moment of realization.
In my typical day, I dress, feed, play, scold, direct, clean, and teach my kids. We spend a lot of time together. This time together is good and fulfilling, but sometimes I just need a few moments to myself -- or at least to be alone in my own one square foot of space.
Clearly, CJ is not on board with this quest. Tuesdays and Thursdays are no-preschool days and we have some serious Mommy-and-me quality time. She wants to play princesses, do puzzles, draw together constantly. But come on, I have to do some work too. There are stacks of dishes, loads of laundry, dog hair to be vacuumed, and emails to be read. So my Tue/Thur schedule is a balancing act of playtime and "Come on, kiddo, I just played princesses for an hour -- can Mommy, please go change the laundry?" Reluctantly, she allows it and follows me up to help.
Which leads me to yesterday. After completing a princess puzzle that was a bit advance for her (read: I did puzzle while she dillydallied), I got up to go to the bathroom. She followed me to the door. I asked her to close the door and give me a moment of privacy. Thankfully, she did and then proceeded to stand on the opposite side of the door and knock, tap and fiddle with the knob. I began to think to myself "GEEZ! I can't even have a moment to be alone while peeing? Really!??!!"
Then --- here comes the revelation --- it hit me. I looked down at the bottom of the door and saw three, perfect little fingers waving at me. They were so adorable and so sweet. My heart was warmed over and a smile appeared on my face. My little girl loves me so much that she can't stand to be AWAY from me for 2 minutes. She is reaching for me from under a doorway and anxiously awaiting my return to her. She clings to me and doesn't ever want me to be away from her. Enjoy it now, I said to myself, because before I know it, my mere existence will be an embarassment to her. She will fall into the pitfalls of teenage-hood and hate me.
The laundry can wait, the dishes can stack, the email can sit unopened. I will take the time and enjoy sharing my square foot of space with my daughter.
6 comments:
had a similar revelation a few weeks ago. :) Enjoy that newly 4 year old!!! She's a sweetie.
Very, very sweet.
Your eye opener came early in your childs life. Remember this when she is 15. All girls find out at 15 Mom is worth nothing, but Dad is better than candy. On the other hand your son will think you are the most wonderful thing since slicded bread. You are right wash, dirty dishes, unmade beds, dog hair, snow removal,grass cutting will all be there after CJ is long out of the house. Love those kid with every bit of love you have. It will be returned to you many times over. love Mom.
I need that reminder constantly. Thanks!
This, my friend and sister, is living in and for the moment! Not always easy to do. And yes, those teenage years become sad for moms. Now I cherish just a few sentences a day that I get from A&S! Ruth
Hey Jean! Awesome story! I remember watching SNL and loving the Jack Handy bit! Remember Ed Grimely?!
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